Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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