we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize
