why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
