We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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