Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
