Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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