My hand turned me down
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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