i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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