I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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