YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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