jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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