I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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