I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
