I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
your like the ambassador to my penis.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Found the puke drawer
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
