sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
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