I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
