Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Randomize
