We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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