i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
