so explain again why im purple
no
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
