mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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