He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
