I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
