guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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