Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
