I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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