Ambien. No doubt about it.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize
