all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
