I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
