The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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