Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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