hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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