so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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