wakey wakey hands off snakey
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
