Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Randomize
