She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
