$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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