I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
