All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Is it because I queefed?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
