He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
