u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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