Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize