I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
