Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
