Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
