Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Randomize
