I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
