I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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