they need to just BURY HIM!
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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