This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Little spoons don't ask big questions
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
